


Shamrock Shakes

by saidno1ever



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, McDonald's, premium buttermilk crispy chicken deluxe sandwich, shitpost in disguise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-22
Updated: 2016-07-22
Packaged: 2018-07-25 23:20:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7551112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saidno1ever/pseuds/saidno1ever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The former queen accompanies her corpse friends on a wondrous journey to obtain a treasure more valuable than the deepest friendships or the most precious of jewels.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shamrock Shakes

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't been to McDonald's in like six years, dude

The fur on Toriel's legs stuck to the front of the car seat, caked with sweat brought on by the abnormally hot weather.The lack of a roof didn't help much. She tried to ignore it by focusing on the way the sun burned her retinas as it reflected off the passing cars. 

Sans was driving. Well, Sans and Papyrus. Papyrus was working the peddles while Sans turned the steering wheel. Toriel had once asked if this type of driving was legal, to which Papyrus replied, “Worry not! Sans is a little too short but with the Great Papyrus helping him, we'll be just fine!” 

Currently the brothers talked together excitedly, seemingly oblivious to the intense heat. Maybe that was because neither had skin. 

"Whoa Pap, slow down." Sans said abruptly. 

"Why?" Papyrus screamed. 

"It's March. We gotta get Shamrock shakes from Mickie D's." 

That sounded interesting, "What are Shamrock shakes?" Toriel asked. 

"Only the second best green thing on the planet, T." 

Sans turned the wheel, cutting across three lanes and hitting the curb to McDonald's. There was a long line in the drive-thru but there was a gap just before the menu for them to squeeze in. 

The cracked yellow speaker shrieked then a dull voice spoke, "Welcome to McDonald's, what can I get you today?" 

"Can I get a premium buttermilk crispy chicken deluxe sandwich!" Papyrus yelled at the top of his nonexistent lungs, before turning, "What would you like, Ms. Toriel?" 

"Uh, an egg mcmuffi-" 

"One egg mcmuffin!" 

"And one kid's meal. Throw in an extra Cutie." Sans added. 

"Yes! And three Shamrock shakes!" 

"Make it six." 

"Six Shamrock shakes!" 

They waited for two minutes before the voice returned, "That'll be $30.83 at the first window." 

"Thanks!" 

Papyrus slammed on the gas then the brake, since the car in front of them still hadn't moved. 

"Six Shamrock shakes?" Toriel asked, absently fanning herself. 

"Two for each of us!" Papyrus beamed. 

Sans swung his legs, apparently having enough room to do so, "Hope you're not lactose intolerant else you're gonna be pooping for days, like Alphys was." 

The car ahead finally pulled forward. Papyrus followed while scraping a melted fifty dollar bill from between the seat. 

"I do not believe that I am." 

The first window folded open, jamming halfway. The employee pushed it back again, causing one of the crumpled cancer awareness stickers to flutter to the pavement, "$30.83." 

Papyrus handed over the fifty then watched patiently as the employee counted out change. 

"Now pull up to the second window." 

"Thank you for the fa-" The window cracked shut before he could finish, "Wowie they must be really busy!" 

“When you're working fast food, you gotta go fast, bro.” 

“That does make sense.” Papyrus shrieked. 

“Are we going home after this? We have been shopping all day and I'm rather tired.” Toriel huffed, sounded patient but absolutely drained. 

“T, once you take one sip of that Shamrock shake you're gonna be ready to run marathons. That's right. Multiple marathons.” 

“I certainly hope-“ 

Toriel and Sans simultaneously lurched backwards when Papyrus obliterated the gas pedal with his heavy boot. The car in front of them barely rolled their window back up before desperately swerving out of the way. 

The McDonald's employee didn't look up from their order screen, “Buttermilk chicken sandwich, egg Mcmuffin and a kid’s meal?” 

“We got some shakes with that.” Sans offered helpfully. 

“Right. Six shakes?” 

“Yup.” 

The employee turned to pick up a paper sack and a red cardboard box, handing it to Papyrus. They adjusted their headset then turned and handed over two shakes. 

“Ms. Toriel do you mind holding the bags?” 

“Of course not.” 

Toriel set the white bag between her feet and the kid’s meal on her lap. She watched Papyrus cram the first two shakes into the front cup holders then stretch backwards to put the next two in the back cup holders. That left him with two shamrock shakes and no more cup holders. 

“Well it would seem that we've made a slight miscalculation.” 

“Dude why don't you just hold it?” 

“Oh yes! Brilliant idea, Brother.” 

Without warning, the car took off again, driving directly through McDonald's front bushes and hitting the curb a second time. 

“Why don't you try your shake, T?” 

“Alright.” Toriel dug a straw out of the white sack and popped it into one of the shakes. 

The car sped down the middle of two lanes as Sans reached over to wrestle a ketchup packet out of the kid's meal death trap. 

“So how is it?” 

Toriel swallowed the two sips she had taken, “This is the most disgusting thing I have ever tasted.”


End file.
